Pomelo - 我的柚子

Last week it was another regular Monday. As usual, I got up around 7:00Am, left home before 8:00 for a seventy five mile drive to the office. It was just another winter morning with a bit thin snow in the air.

I turned on the radio and listened to WOUB which is NPR in South East Ohio. Actually it is the best public station I ever have had. While I drove through Nelsonville, snowing started a bit thicker. I switched to Pat Metheny. Somehow I love that feeling to drive through white snow powder and mesmerize cruising through California coastline when that music is on. But this time the ride was a bit different. My emotion gate just busted open on me. It brought this ride all the way back almost forty years ago. It became vivid and right back in front of me.

I still remembered that was a sizzling summer time. I was about 4. My dad was not around much since he was always assigned to work on projects far away. We might see him every three or four months. My mom was a high school principal. Always she had endless meetings into 10 to 11 PM. Still my brother and I were able to see her everyday. However this very summer, she was asked to go to another part of city and stay to receive group study for two months. It was not unusual during the chaotic period in China. She was allowed to come back home every Saturday. Sunday was only day off for a week then. During the week, my brother sent me to kindergarten and then went to school in the morning. For me, I had my three meals in the kindergarten. I knew that my mom gave my brother some money and kept some money in our neighbor for him as well. I could not remember how he got by his three meals every day. Sometimes, he picked me up in the kindergarten in the afternoon and we took a bus to go and stay with my aunt over night. Sometimes my brother had to wait outside door until I finished my supper. I still have that image of my skinny sweaty brother waiting outside the door and hoping I could swallow my food faster. It took us about 40 minutes to our aunt's home. Most times we went back to our home on our own during the week.

We counted our fingers every day for that very Saturday since we could see our mom again. During the week, we had no way to communicate with her since no access to the phone. Even though we might be all dirty during the week, we always washed our faces and feet and had a clean clothes on before walking to the bus station. We did not want her to worry about us. We walked through the neighborhood, market and arrive in the station in 10 minutes. We always got the station at 6:00 PM. When every bus arrived, we were just so anxious to fear that we ever missed her. When finally mom appeared, that was the happiest moment in our whole week. My mom checked through us from head to toe many times. She might be just relieved that we were just fine. The every first time she brought us a pomelo fruit. We were so excited and could not wait to get home and cut it open. My brother and I just fought to hold that pomelo on the way home. My mom had to let me hold half way first before reluctantly handing over to my brother. We tried to preserve a bit long but it would be long gone before the weekend is over when my mom had to leave again.

We started to count again for the next yummie pomelo. It was another Saturday. We washed our faces and feet and arrived in the bus station at 6:00PM. Many bus stopped and left. We checked every single person coming out of buses. That familiar face just did not show up. Bus arrived from every 10 minutes,20 minutes to 30 minutes. We had been in the station for 4 hours and it was already dark. We started to realize that mom might not be back today. We just had to go back home for the safety. It was a long way home for that 10 minute walk. I dragged my feet. I just wanted to cry in the dark and could not. We turned our heads every few steps to hope that mom miraculously appeared right behind us. But I just did not have someone to have arms around and cry to. My brother was just another kid 3 years older. I can not remember how we spent that long dark night and the day followed. I was worried about our mom but just could not imagine how much more worry and guilty went through her mind through another long week.

Every time I taste a bite of this juicy fruit, its bitter and sweet sense offers a life experience more memoriable.